Madison Awakening

I roll my eyes as Kevin sits down at the table across from me and starts pounding dinner rolls. A few new people join the table that also work with Jonathan and we all make polite introductions. As the mic starts warming up for the MC, James sits back down and Antonella joins the table. She looks at Jonathan then at me and I decide to be politely petty.

“Hi! I’m Madison and this is Jonathan. And you are?” I say innocently and I hear James muffle a laugh.  Jonathan clears his throat and starts proper introductions.

“Madison, this Antonella Vincenza. She and I used to date. Antonella, this is Madison Davis, my girlfriend.” He says matter of factly, then caresses the back of my neck with his thumb. Antonella looks visibly annoyed despite the tightness of her face.  I’m not sure she realized that Jonathan would be here. 

She gives me a small wave. “Nice to meet you, Madison.” She says with a strained smile and then finally starts engaging her date. 

We all continue our separate conversations as the wine and salads make their way to the table just as the MC begins the event. A striking woman with beautiful mahogany skin in a sparkly gold gown gets everyone’s attention.

“Good evening everyone! And welcome to the ‘Artfully We Stand’ annual fundraiser. Thank you all for your generosity for this worthy cause in supporting artistic endeavors for all students in New York City.”

Throughout the event in between the delicious food, students from the program performed beautiful original works of dance, song and performance art. The air in the room was joyous, which was only disturbed by Kevin and Antonella consistently getting up to go to the bathroom. Everytime they came back they would jabber a mile a minute and then make out at the table. I would watch Jonathan’s reaction and it didn’t seem to phase him one bit. That made me happy. This girl really had no impact on him at all.

The entire night, he has his hand on my exposed thigh as reassurance of my placement by his side. And when he had to leave me for some offical duty, James was right there to take his spot. As dessert comes out, the MC reemerges once again to quiet the crowd.

“Hey everyone! Before we close out the night, it is important to recognize one of our benefactors. He and his team are always there to support our students by giving them internships in his restaurants, paying for overseas study at top schools, in addition to direct monetary support. So we would like to present the award for Benefactor of the Year to Jonathan Cain.”

As the room erupted with applause, Jonathan rises and heads to the stage. I had no idea he was getting an award and I don’t think he did either. He keeps his face stoic and when he gets on stage he takes the crystal award from one of the students and makes his way to the podium. I see Antonella leave from the corner of my eye, I assume for a coke break. But I redirect my attention to the man of the moment.

“Thank you so much. It has been my honor to be on the board for the organization the past two years. Seeing the impact on the students by having access to opportunities in the arts without the worry of cost has added a special dimension to my life.”  

As Jonathan continues his speech, I can’t help but be more enthralled by him. He spoke passionately about the arts and shared some of the success stories of the program. When he finishes, the crowd is on their feet and he makes his way back to the table. Once he sits, I kiss him passionately. When I pull away, Jonathan l moves his lips to my ear.

“I guess that means you like my speech.” He says in a hushed tone and kisses my earlobe.

I let out a slight giggle and kiss his cheek. “Yes. You did an amazing job.”

Jonathan smirks.“What is my reward, Miss Davis?”

“Umm..I think we can discuss some options. But I have to go to the ladies room first. I’ll be back.”

Thankfully, there is no line at the bathroom and I walk right into a stall.  After I finish, I go to the sink and someone starts walking towards the other sink. When I look up, Antonella is staring at me in the mirror with her best attempt at a scowl with all that botox in her face. I turn off the water, dry my hands and take out my compact. She turns to face me as I touch up my makeup.

“Have I seen you before tonight?” She asks, trying to sound polite. Still not facing her direcion, I take out my lip gloss and fix up my lip liner.

“I’m not sure. I was recently in the Hamptons. Do you summer there?” I say with the same fake politeness. Then I turn and smile at her, mirroring the one I gave her that night at James’ party. That must have triggered her, causing her face to becomes even tighter.

“Okay, we can stop pretending. What do you think you are doing with Jonathan?”  She says with a now detectable Italian accent and venom.  

Oh? She mad…and I couldn’t help laughing. I have a decent amount of alcohol in my system, and my tolerance for bullshit is low. I put my lip gloss back in my clutch then start smoothing my hair in the mirror.

“Look Antonella. I don’t know what happened between you and Jonathan. And to be honest, I don’t give a fuck. You are over. You’re here with his partner. So, I think you need to get out of my business.”  I say, do a little twirl, then face her.  

Antonella crosses her arms as she looks me up and down. “You think he’s really into you don’t you? You’re okay looking but you don’t belong in this world. You’ll never be good enough for him. And you’ll never measure up to her…”

Her tone is an octave that is too damn high for me not to want to smack the shit out of her. What the fuck is she talking about anyway? Her who? The damage is done and rage takes over every molecule in my body. I take a cleasing breath, smile and use my teacher voice to get my point across.

“Listen slut. I’ve been more than tolerate of you tonight, so I’m going to give you pass, by not fucking you up in my favorite library. But if you ever in your life even think about mentioning my man’s name again, I’ll rearrange your veneers. Now, wipe the fucking coke off your nose,whore.” I say with a smile, leaving her in shocked silence.

I turn and walk out of the bathroom at full speed. My heart is racing and I move around the other guests heading to the now open dance floor. As I get to the table, James and Jonathan are laughing about something. Thankfully, Kevin is making a fool of himself by the DJ booth so I don’t have to deal with him.

I plop down in my seat, trying to reset myself from the anger I’m controlling. I grab my wine, drink it down and pound the glass on the table. Jonathan and James both turn, giving me a puzzled look. I can’t fake a smile right now, so I sit quietly. Jonathan scoots over and places his hand on my thigh as I keep my eyes focused downward.

“What’s wrong?” He asks softly with concern.

I shake my head. “I don’t want to talk about it here.”

“Do you want to go? All the major stuff is over so I just need to text Michael.”

“Text Michael.” I say and I see Antonella walking past the table over to Kevin. 

She knows not to bring her ass back over here. Jonathan motions to James that we are going to head out and he walks over to my chair, while Jonathan stands up and sends out the text.

James sits and caresses my hand. “Everything okay hun?”

I make a huff. “I just need to get out of here. Are you staying?”

James looks me over, seeing my annoyance.“Yeah for a little while. I am so glad you came though. I’ll be back from Brazil in two weeks. You must come out to the Hamptons when I get back. Promise me?”

“I promise.” I say and give him a hug and kiss, then stand up. 

James gives Jonathan a hug and he repeats his demand for a visit to his estate when he gets back. Jonathan reaches out his hand and tucks me under his arm as we walk towards the exit.

 I’m not really mad anymore, but now my mind is swirling. I shouldn’t take anything that cokehead says seriously, but something about what she said really is bothering me.

Who is the person I’ll never live up to in her opinion?

I’m silent as Jonathan and I walk out of the library, still tightly tucked close to him. His body is a comfort and I feel calmer but my mood is sour. I can see Michael waiting for us at the curb and I can’t wait to get home. Jonathan’s phone starts to ring, he grabs it and looks at the screen, stopping mid stride. He gives me an apologetic look and I nod in understanding as I take the award from him.

I walk up ahead and leave Jonathan behind so that he can take his call. As I move down the stairs, the wind picks up sending shivers through me, not improving my disposition. When I get to the curb, Michael is there to greet me with his usual hat tip and warm smile. I smile weakly at him as I get in the SUV.

I sit in the backseat stewing in my bad mood. Jonathan is still on the call and based on his body language it’s not going well.  His body is rigid as he paces back and forth on the second tier of steps.  After what seems like forever, he hangs up and walks to the car. He and Michael exchange words longer than usual. Finally, Jonathan gets into the car and slides in close to me.

I know I’m radiating bad vibes. But whatever the call was about, has totally changed his energy too. He takes my hand to try and cover but I know there is something bothering him. I give him a fake smile then look out the window. After a few minutes, I noticed we were going the opposite way from my place. I turn and move up in my seat to say something to Michael but when I open my mouth Jonathan interrupts me.  

“We’re going to my place.” He announces. 

I whip my head around and look at him with surprise, then punch the button to the partition and wait for it to close.

“I said I wanted to go home.” I say in an elevated tone.

“No. You said you wanted to leave. So we left. And now we are going to SoHo.”  He responds coldly while looking out the window. And that’s when the heat starts rising from within and the dam breaks.

“The only reason I wanted to fucking leave was because that BITCH Antonella got in my face about you! Andddd… you take a long ass phone call making me wait to NOT go home! I’m fucking pissed.” I scream loudly and rip my hand out of his.

Jonathan is stonefaced.“Madison. I know you’re pissed but can we just get to my place and hash it out there? I don’t want to have a blowout in the car. We will be there soon.” He says in a robotic manner and turns back to the window.

I sit back in my seat in a huff, and let my anger simmer. I know there is no point in trying to get out. I’ve learned that fighting him when it comes to location is a waste. So, I’ll let him get his way.

I’m going to his real home, not his playhouse. But I can’t even get excited about seeing it because I’m so mad. We go over the Brooklyn Bridge and I try to focus on the lights as a way to bring the anger down but it isn’t working. 

I start to replay the bathroom encounter, removing the emotion, and think logically. Antonella is not really my issue. She was exactly what Jonathan said she was, sad and pathetic. But her words are bothering me. She implied there is someone else I am trying to live up to. She doesn’t say it is her, but she wanted me to know it was somebody. And as soon as we leave, he gets a phone call. 

Are the two connected?

Maybe, but I know he is managing a world I could never truly comprehend. He works in different time zones. I would expect for him to have calls at various times of the day. But he did leave me hanging at the winery for a phone call. If it was just business would he have left me that long, or are all the phone calls a personal priority?